Working woman.

It’s weird for me sometimes having two blogs.  My other blog is typically just for yoga talk.  This blog tends to house all of my other thoughts.  It works, but sometimes I struggle to figure out where to write certain things.  Yoga is such a huge part of my life, it’s rare for me to write anything without mentioning it at least a bit.  But the variety is nice, so I guess it doesn’t really matter.

I’ve been really enjoying  Matt’s new blog.  It’s great, you should definitely read it.  And comment, and join in the discussions.  Go now, I will wait.

Anyhow.

I have a job.  How weird is that?  I have spent the past eight years of my life basically unemployed.  Prior to that I worked for YWAM Denver.  Which, depending on how you look at it wasn’t really employment per se.  So now, at the age of 29, I have a real job.  Except, well, it’s the best.. job… ever.

Being a yoga teacher, for me, is..  well…  perfect.  It’s the perfect job for me.  Really.  It’s been funny to suddenly be on a schedule, getting paid (OK that part is more awesome than weird or funny), and having to be on time for work.  I don’t mind, I’m a grown up, and I love teaching.  But seriously, I have a job.  A real job.  Nice one, mamma.

Working has been good for me.  It’s given me time doing the thing I love, teaching yoga, and some time to be alone a bit.  But there are a few interesting things I’ve learned and observed lately about myself, working, and having a job. (I am shamelessly stealing this list making idea from Matt, thanks Matt)

When you have a job, alarm clocks take on new importance.
I am obsessed with being on time, and I’m almost always early.
A good cup or maté, or a good cup of coffee is essential when working before 6 am.
Being a “Yoga Teacher” solicits a LOT of interesting responses.
I have the BEST work wardrobe ever.
My “office” is really hot.  But it’s supposed to be.  I like it.
Having a good relationship with your boss is really important.
A warm cup of tea in the middle of the afternoon can really fix almost anything.
Feeling good about what you do for a living might be one of the biggest keys to being happy in life.
My kids love it that “Mommy works at Yoga.”
Spending a whole day away from home makes those ‘welcome home’ hugs and kisses even better.
Working is rewarding.
Working can be exhausting.
Working is sometimes boring.
I like having a job.
Sometimes a granola bar and a cup of soy milk is enough for dinner.
I don’t go anywhere without a bottle of water.
Having access to unlimited tea, Kombucha, and coconut water is awe-some.
I have the best job ever.

17 in 14

I’m not bragging. Ok, maybe I am. But I so kick ass at this Bikram Yoga thing. I know, I am certainly no Sarah Baughn or Cynthia Wehr.. BUT I kick ass. Plain and simple. Today marked class 17. So far I have completed seventeen classes in fourteen days. Yes, that means I “doubled” up three times.. See, Kick Ass.

The craziest things are happening to me. Besides the obvious benefits of my jeans looking better and my back feeling like solid gold. Even more mysterious workings are happening deep in the tissues of my body.. I feel more alert, more calm, more focused. Staring at yourself, and your body. The reality of your whole self for 90 minutes every single day (sometimes twice) kinda creates this self acceptance. You just have to let go and accept yourself, your body, who you are.. Even with all the sweat dripping off of every surface of your body.. See, beauty does come from withing. Deep breath, second set…

I guess when you do this enough.. and I have actually heard rumor of this, so I guess I am starting to believe. I guess you do get the “endorphin high” and it’s real. Even when the alarm goes off at 4:15 am for that 5:30 class, you don’t fight anymore. You accept, breathe, and accept.. Even the early mornings. Because you know, no matter how class goes, you will feel better when you come out. You know your body will feel like a sponge that has been completely wrung out.. and it’s great.

Today as I was showering after that “Earlier than God gets up” class, I couldn’t stop smiling. Thinking of how much I have nosedived into this new life. When I went back to yoga, I started this challenge. Nov 1 was my first day back at BYTW since July 4.. I haven’t missed a day yet. and I don’t plan to. It’s not that I am on some masochistic mission to “whip my body into shape”.. It’s not that I have to keep up with everyone else on the challenge. It’s just that I can’t imagine NOT doing it. I mean, there’s such a camaraderie.. There’s a group of us that seem to all end up in class together. It feels good to encourage each other. To laugh, smile, and complain together. To discuss the various details of which teacher made it “too hot” and which teacher pushed us too far and such.. Not that any of it matters. Class is class. It is what it is.. But it’s nice to have companionship..

So here’s to working hard and doing what feels good..

Impossible is nothing

Someone recently commented to me that my yoga challenge was “insane” and “impossible this time of year…” and honestly I can kinda agree. But the truth of the matter is there really is no GOOD time to cram 60 Bikram classes in, is there?? If you follow that logic, you’d never really ever do the class. I mean, nobody really LOVES what goes on in there, right?? 90 mins of heat, sweat, and HARD work.. Why? Because impossible is nothing.. Nothing. Arnie (one of my teachers) often says “you can talk yourself into or out of anything..” So true, so true.. Often I think we exercise the latter. Telling ourselves “it’s a bad time of year to focus on yoga” or “now’s not a good time to commit to a routine..” whatever, it’s easy and even logical to call sixty straight days of Bikram impossible. But don’t tell the 54 other students enrolled in the challenge that, we all have our eyes on the prize. New health, a new body, and most importantly – that warm fuzzy feeling. I DID IT.. I did it.. Impossible is nothing..

So, today I did a back to back class. Totaling just over three hours in the heat. Working, working hard. Tonight I am markedly more exhausted than usual. But I do feel good. It’s interesting what your mind goes through.. Euphoria, excitement, anxiety, exhaustion, fear, denial, bargaining, complaining, and then somewhere along the way.. acceptance.. Just do the class, Karen. Just do it.. The first class is all good. Work hard, do the class. Then the second class starts and you start to question just how good of an idea all this sweating is.. I mean, it’s not really THAT healthy for me, right?? Today, I went through about seventy different emotions between the time first class ended and the third posture of my second class started.. Impossible is nothing, but dammit if I can’t turn my stupid brain off.

Tomorrow, luckily, I am only doing ONE class. only one. Which, I guess is a good reason to be grateful. Impossible is nothing..

Sunburn in November

Random, no?? I could come up with no other suitable title.. So, that’s what you get…

I am finding, here, as I delve into this Facebook thing, that I am constantly being asked “what’s up with you now??”, “how are you??”, “what’s happening in your life?” So get ready, here it comes..

Well, for starters, life is freaking amazing. Plain and simple. Even on my low days (and I’ve had a few lately) I can’t shake that.. Life is amazing. I am totally amazed, totally honored, humbled and moved.. Recently Dave and I celebrated our six year wedding anniversary. I think at that point, I realized what my mother always warned me about was true.. Time does fly. and it just starts flying by even faster when you start living it.. The past year has been a formative year for me, and our family.. But for now, I will just talk about me..

We moved into our house a year and a half ago. Celebrated our first year of home ownership in June.. I had ankle surgery almost exactly one year ago. So many big things.. We have made HUGE life decisions in the past year, and it’s just amazing.. How does life hand you so many choices and then TRUST you not to screw them up?? I have no idea. But it’s amazing. I started this year with a busted foot. Literally, only 8 weeks out from my surgery and hurting bad. I was frustrated and angry, but I pressed on. If you’ve known me very long, you know I love Bikram Yoga.. So, in January, I went back to yoga, busted foot and all. Dave and I were trying to make a decision about whether he would go back to school. Something he’s wanted for so long. We also tossed around the idea of putting Simon in preschool.. For the past year we’ve only had one vehicle. which, shockingly enough, hasn’t been THAT hard.

Well, before my brain spill goes into overdrive.. I’ll stay on track. When you have kids, especially young kids, life takes on seasons.. appropriately so.. I guess it’s probably like that for everyone, but I really noticed it when I had my kids.. So, there ya go.. Well, the past year of seasons has been unlike any other. I remember when I was single, or in YWAM, things passed differently. Now things pass with marked days.. First teeth, walking, first day of school, first haircut.. Christmas, Birthdays, even deaths.. They just feel different now.. Really, in a good way too.

Well, this year, all of my seasons have been incredibly distinct.. I can almost mark their changes with a marker on a calendar. Last winter was hard, cold. I was in a cast. Then spring came and things got better. I was feeling better and we were excited to see what God was going to do in our lives. The summer brought challenges, and exhaustion. Dave started school. We started making plans for Simon to start preschool. and now, Blessed Fall. my favorite of all. Fall is when it all happens. Our anniversary, both of our sons’ birthdays. holidays. I dig fall. I also love Fall because it’s the time of year I feel most creative. This fall, I picked up my guitar for the first time in years and wrote not just one but five songs in less than two weeks. And as surprising for me as that is, it’s just so freaking cool!

Well, tomorrow my baby turns TWO! Ellijah turns two tomorrow. He is our last child. We will have no more.. and he’s TWO! amazing, no?? I cannot believe it’s been two years.. TWO YEARS..

Ok enough with the sappy mom bit. Back to how freaking cool life is.. Dave started a Master’s Degree program in June for his LPC (Licensed Professional Counselor) in Counseling.. I could not be happier for him, honestly.. This is something he’s wanted for years. Since we got together. And here we are, living life.. Doing the thing, cool right?? I think so..

Probably the best news of at least the past few months is that we have finally found a “church”.. I hate even using that word because we don’t even identify ourselves as such.. Rather a “community”.. and it’s everything we have been begging God for since we got married.. Just an amazing group of people that we can connect spiritually with and try to find our way.. Amazing. really amazing. It’s funny how God puts people in your path. And if you are lucky enough to listen and pay attention, it pays off. Big time. We are now enjoying a group that we’ve been looking for soooo long..

So, that’s the terribly mangled guide to our life. Dave’s in school, Simon’s in preschool, and I’m writing music.. Oh and doing yoga again.. And little Eli, well, he’s just himself. and now he’s TWO..

Can’t believe it’s ONLY November 1..